US President Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “Courage is not the absence of fear but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.”
After over 20 years of working with nearly a thousand couples, there’s one thing I can say for sure: Successful relationships require courage.
Is your relationship worth pushing through the fear?
So ask yourself whether your relationship is worth pushing through the fear you may feel to talk to your partner about hard things? Is it worth going to therapy even though doing so may make you feel anxious?
After your partner has criticized you or hurt your feelings, it requires bravery to breathe and come back to your partner to talk about what happened.
Courage requires taking accountability
In my own relationships, one of my go-to moves used to be not saying what upset me but being hurt on the inside and shutting down. Over time, I’ve learned to work up the courage to let someone know if I’ve been hurt, understanding that if I don’t get the desired response, I’ll still be okay.
Is your normal move to get defensive? It takes courage to take accountability instead.
What if you normally react strongly? How much courage would it take to breathe and try a gentler approach?
I just saw another quote I love in an inspirational quote card deck that said, “Take a deep breath and keep going. Isn’t there a chance of being surprised by what happens next?”
Need help?
If your relationship needs a serious jumpstart, consider Intensive Couples Counseling. Through two-days of therapy (six hours per day), I’ll help you address the issues that are holding your relationship back. I’ll guide you and your partner to repair past hurts so that you can reconnect and move forward with a much stronger, healthier connection.